You didn’t learn how to deal with difficult emotions in a single day. It’s actually quite the opposite—the way you cope today is the culmination of a lifetime spent observing, listening to, and learning from others.
Most men can recall at least one formative childhood moment that shaped their personal narrative when it comes to mental health.
It’s usually a story similar to the one below:
Robert was 9 years old. He’d been saving for months to buy a G.I. Joe action figure. Finally, he had enough to make the purchase. He excitedly announced the news to his close friends at school, as his father had agreed to drive him to the toy store that evening.
After the last bell rang, Robert sat impatiently on the front steps of the school, waiting for his father to arrive. Ten minutes went by, then twenty, then thirty… until he could no longer contain his disappointment.
When his Dad finally arrived, forty-five minutes late, he informed Robert they would have to postpone their trip to the toy store due to a car collision that was blocking traffic.
Robert began to cry, frustrated that his plans were derailed, and humiliated that he’d told all of his friends, who were expecting him to bring the action figure to school the next morning.
Already irritated by the delay in traffic, Robert’s father showed no empathy for his experience, and responded to his cries with a sharp order. “Put on your seatbelt and stop whining. You’re a young man, not a baby.”
This is where mental health messaging for men begins. Even as a child, you were being exposed to language and behaviors that would become part of your internal dialogue.
Maybe you can remember hearing:
- “You’re too sensitive. Learn to take a joke.”
- “If you don’t stop crying, I’ll give you something to cry about.”
- “Real men don’t cry.”
- “Man up. Life is hard, learn to deal with it.”
- “Men don’t complain about their problems; they fix them.”
With messages like these, is it any wonder why we avoid talking about men’s mental health?
Plus, these messages don’t stop in childhood. They’re reinforced in adulthood as well, just in more subtle and conspicuous ways.
Let’s think about men’s mental health at work. What messages are conveyed in professional environments?
Oftentimes, it’s harmful messages like:
- “Personal issues should stay at home.”
- “It’s just work stress. Everyone deals with it. He’ll snap out of it soon.”
- “Maybe he’s just not cut out for this job.”
- “Did you forget your happy pills today?”
- “We’re swamped right now. We can’t have you taking time off for therapy sessions.”
This is why it’s so critical that we start de-stigmatizing men’s mental health, especially in the workplace. It’s impossible to create change without actively working to counteract these unhealthy, ingrained messages.
Let’s explore what that looks like.
A Guide to Unlearning Mental Health Messaging for Men
1. Acknowledging Gender Differences in Mental Health Messaging
Both men and women experience mental health stigma, but it’s often in different ways. One example of this is how frequently mental health conversations happen in social circles.
It’s considered more socially acceptable for women to talk to one another about difficult emotions like stress, heartbreak, grief, etc, but it’s often discouraged amongst male friend groups.
Additionally, men are more likely to develop unhealthy coping behaviors like substance abuse as a means of coping with poor mental health, as these behaviors are normalized by other men in their lives.
If we are going to shift the narrative of mental health messaging for men, we must be conscious of the differences in how mental illness and stigma impacts men vs women.
2. Challenging Harmful Stereotypes
Did you know men living with mental illness are also more likely to be viewed as “dangerous” than women living with the same conditions? This can make others more hesitant to offer support, making men more likely to experience isolation, loneliness, and shame.
An overwhelming 58% of men also say society expects them to be “emotionally strong” and not show weakness, contributing to the stereotype that vulnerability in men is a negative attribute.
It’s not enough to simply acknowledge these stereotypes. True and lasting change requires speaking up when we hear or see them playing out in our daily lives.
You can respond by saying things like:
- “There’s no such thing as male or female emotions. We’re all human and how you feel is valid.”
- “Don’t assume someone would hurt you just because they’re unwell.”
- “He’s dealing with a health issue, just like someone with any other medical condition.”
- “Imagine if it were someone you cared about; how would you want them to be treated?”
- “His mental illness doesn’t define his character or his ability to do his job.”
58% of men also say society expects them to be “emotionally strong” and not show weakness, contributing to the stereotype that vulnerability in men is a negative attribute.
3. Being Honest About Cultural Pressures
There are a lot of external factors that contribute to why men choose to suffer in silence. Cultural upbringing is one of the most influential.
Many cultures place a strong emphasis on traditional masculinity, which discourages men from showing vulnerability or seeking help for mental health issues. There are even cultures and religious belief systems that expressly disapprove of modern psychology or any form of therapy.
With this in mind, it’s crucial to foster inclusive spaces where men feel safe to share their feelings and experiences without fear of judgment, which requires diversity training and challenging our own unconscious biases.
4. Encouraging Open Conversation About Men’s Mental Health
When it comes to men’s mental health at work this point couldn’t be more essential. Male employees should be empowered to have transparent discussions about how they’re feeling. It not only helps to reduce stigma but also allows for early intervention and support, preventing issues from escalating in the future.
Ways to encourage open dialogue include:
- Establishing peer support groups
- Promoting men’s mental health awareness campaigns
- Holding regular check-ins with male employees
- Organize lunchtime discussion groups
- Plan stress-relief activities for your team
5. Promoting Male Mental Health Education
Offering education about mental health can really make a difference for men. It helps them spot signs of stress, anxiety, and depression sooner, so they can get support early on. These sessions also teach practical coping strategies and stress management techniques that work at home and on the job.
You can provide access to online resources such as articles, videos, or webinars tailored to men’s mental health, or you can offer in-person sessions to equip men with crucial skills necessary to recognize and manage their mental well-being effectively.
It’s Time to Send a Different Message. Invest in Corporate Mental Health Training and Support the Men You Work With.
At Catalyst Mental Health, we specialize in empowering teams with practical skills like stress management, resilience building, and conversation guidelines, so they can better advocate for themselves and the people they care about.
The result? A thriving, productive, and supportive environment where everyone feels valued and understood.
Partner with us today and let’s lead the charge in shifting the narrative around men’s mental health.