August 25, 2020|Mental Health

The Importance of Shifting Our Focus Back to the Little Ones That Look Up to Us

As adults, we often forget what it felt like to be a small child. We forget that from a very early age, children experience powerful emotions and absorb the energy around them, even if they don’t fully understand what is happening.

This is particularly important to remember in the wake of COVID-19. While parents around the world have been exchanging views on whether or not children should attend school during coronavirus, their little ones have been paying close attention and attempting to make sense of what they are witnessing.

We must not fool ourselves when it comes to how intelligent and observant our tiny humans can be.

It’s time for us to put ourselves in the little shoes we taught our children how to tie and consider what returning to school during COVID-19 will feel like for them.

The Connection Between Child Anxiety and COVID-19

There are several different factors that can contribute to the development of an anxiety disorder in school-age children. 

Some kids are genetically predisposed to anxiety and other forms of mental illness. This is especially true if a parent is living with anxiety and exposes the child to their anxious thoughts or behaviors.

In most cases, however, anxiety is a symptom caused by environmental stressors. And this happens to be the case when it comes to the relationship between child anxiety and COVID-19.

There is a wide range of external events or circumstances that can cause a child to experience anxiety, including:

• The death of a loved one or close friend
• Family conflict or separation
• Witnessing extreme violence
• Becoming seriously ill or being injured in an accident
• Bullying
• Seeing or hearing disturbing content (TV programs about war, terrorism, etc.)

Unfortunately, all of the media coverage surrounding COVID-19, in addition to the inescapable life changes the virus has resulted in, are enough to be considered a stressful life event for children and thus can result in child anxiety.

Why Your Child May Have a Fear of Returning to School

As mentioned above, external factors and stressors are a key part of understanding why children are experiencing anxiety.

Below are some reasons your little one may be nervous about the 2020 school year:

• They have overhead reports of COVID-19 deaths (from the radio while driving in the car, TV news programs, etc.) and don’t fully understand the risk to themselves or their loved ones
• Their normal routine went through a lot of sudden changes due to the virus, and they are struggling to adapt. As a result, they may be reluctant to further change, including returning to school during coronavirus.
• During times of uncertainty, many children cope with anxiety by becoming overly attached to a parent or loved one. Many kids are afraid of returning to school during COVID-19 because they want to remain close to their families where they feel most secure and comforted.
• They may not fully comprehend how the virus works and thus they may feel out of control. Without adequate information, children may fear they are at risk of contracting the virus when they do normal activities, such as using the bathroom or touching doorknobs. This can lead to a hypersensitivity and intensified state of anxiousness.
• They may have witnessed your emotional responses to stressful situations surrounding COVID-19 and are now mimicking your emotional regulation skills (or lack thereof). For instance, they may have overheard you talking on the phone to a friend about how you feel it’s dangerous for kids to return to school and your disapproval of your government’s return to school plan, which could contribute to their own feelings of anxiety.

How to Support Your Child’s Mental Health as They Return to School

Below are some of the most effective ways to alleviate coronavirus anxiety in children:

Empower Your Child With Knowledge

Just like adults, children fear the unknown. For this reason, parents should make every effort to educate their children about COVID-19 and instill confidence.

Teach your children how to properly wash their hands, put on their mask, socially distance, and apply hand sanitizer. Practice these protocols often before school starts to ensure they are already in the habit. Show them safe ways to interact with friends and loved ones, such as bumping elbows instead of hugging or high-fiving, or using Facetime to connect with friends.

The more informed your children are, the less vulnerable they will feel and the greater their personal sense of control will be.

Help Them Identify and Copy With Stressors

It’s easy to forget that little minds often don’t have the experience required to analyze or even recognize the source of their anxiety. This is where parents come in!

Try sitting down with your child and getting them to list the things they are worried about or afraid of. Then discuss each one. Provide them with reasons why the worry may not be as serious as they think it is. Help them list ways they can comfort themselves when a specific concern arises. 

It may even be a good idea to meet with your child’s teacher to inform them of any severe stressors your little one is struggling with. If your child has separation anxiety, for example, their teacher may be willing to let them keep a photo of their pet on their desk or keep their favorite toy in their backpack to enjoy during free time.

Limit Media Exposure

Do your best to limit the amount of exposure your child has to news programs on TV, radio reports, and the internet. Supervise these activities as much as possible and respond to any questions your child may have.

It may be beneficial to let your child know that media outlets often focus on bad news and that just because something is on TV does not make it automatically true.

Encourage your child to come to you for answers instead of relying on Google searches or media reports.

Regulate Your Emotional Responses

This is absolutely imperative. Child anxiety is an overwhelming experience for your little one. When they see signs that you are experiencing overwhelm too, it can leave them feeling especially insecure and vulnerable.

Children need a healthy example to follow. Always pause before responding in stressful situations and take time to yourself to release your own worry before engaging with your kids.

Try practicing mindfulness and relaxation techniques with your children. Meditation, deep breathing, coloring, and gratitude exercises are all excellent ideas that can help both you and your little ones feel more at ease.

Remember, when we connect deeply with our children, model ideal behaviours, and reassure them in times of certainty, they are able to better navigate their own feelings and build their sense of self.

Instead of joining in the chaos, show your kids the beauty of being calm.

You’ll be amazed at how well they respond!

Are you interested in connecting with mental health experts who can help your family thrive despite the uncertainty that surrounds the 2020 school year? 

Check out the list of monthly resources on our website or reach out today! We’d be happy to connect you.